Some guy on CE posted a link to GameSpot’s Iron Man review, and I found it atrocious. I skipped to the middle and all the guy was doing was describing what was going on in the video. Gee, thanks a lot guys… Anyway, that’s all I needed to see to make a valid assumption as to what the rest of the video was like, and it was absolute rubbish. So here are what I’d say if I were doing the review.

“Today’s video review is Iron Man. It’s a game by the soulless, shadow of what it once was company who is heading in the same path as Atari: Sega. The game stars nobody’s favorite… Iron Man, a character who’s only fame comes from song that only the cool kids know. And by cool kids, I mean asses. Okay, so let’s get to the review. You are Iron Man and you fly around and shoot things. F-. Thanks for watching everyone!”

If anyone wants to hire me, I’m takin’ offers…

And just for kicks, here’s my Iron Man movie review. Albeit I haven’t actually seen the movie yet… and to the tell the truth it looks alright, but that’s no fun! So:

“Iron Man stars Robert Downey Jr., and he’s just as coked up as you remember him! The movie begins with him wanting to blow stuff up, and ends with him flying around and blowing stuff up. F-. Thanks for watching everyone!”

-(CE)Ian