I love how Canadian women say “sorry.” I find it so different, so provoking, that it’s sexy. So, so sexy.

Now I suppose that Canadian men say it the same way, but whatever. Who cares? Not me.

Example you say? Well since you asked.

Around the 20 second mark.

It simply is amazing. I cannot even begin to explain how sexy this pronunciation of the word “sorry” is. Okay I lied, I can, and here it is. Whenever I hear the word sorry, and it is done with that certain tone, that certain ring and feel that only a Canadian woman could produce, my heart flutters, my breath shortens, and my mind is afloat with bliss. Not to mention it makes me write long sentences. To say that it is just how they say it up in Canada would be a gross underestimate of how wonderful and pleasing that sound is. Truly only those gifted enough are able to pronounce it such, while us unworthy cretins are cursed forever to pronounce it with simple tongue. Canadian woman are truly the fruit of the earth, the gift of nature, the blessing from the gods!

How can a simple word such as “sorry” provoke so much attraction and fondness for the person who said it? As mind boggling as it is, consider this: When a woman speaks to a man, or man to a woman, over the phone in one of those “phone sex” chat lines, are those not just words spoken from one human being to another? Of course, but you say, the sounds aren’t what provokes the sexuality of the phone call, it is the meaning behind the words. And to this I say, yes. You are correct. The person could be yelling in gibberish and still provide the same sexual feeling as if they were saying explicit things. And this I find shallow, uninteresting, and cliche. I want more than just meaning behind words. I want the word itself. No! I want the way the word was pronounced! Is this asking too much? Is it being daft and irrational? Of course not. Why, I believe it to surpass this form of communication entirely! Meaning behind words are on a lower plane of communication than the pronunciation of the word itself! And for a nation to have this ability to render sexual thought and feeling using this… it is just phenomenal.

So Canada! I salute you, your women, and your dialect. I hope that one day the world recognizes your supreme dialect, and we all advance communication and language to match your skilled technique.

-(CE)Ian