Hipsters are a threat to North American culture. Hipsters are everywhere: they’re in our schools, in our bars, in our parks, in our libraries, in our music, and maybe even our own homes. Their treacherous breed will destroy modern society as we know it unless we can stop it. But how can we protect ourselves from the hipsters if we are unsure of what they are? In this post, I will explain what hipsters look like so that we may identify them and deal with them as such.
This is a prime example of a hipster:
Notice her sunglasses. She’s wearing them underground. Why? She’s wearing them because no one wears sunglasses underground, or at least, no one should wear them underground. They’re also huge. Huge glasses are a a staple of hipster fashion, most of the time colorful. Also take note of plaid top. Why plaid? Is she an Al Borland fan? No. She wears it because no one wears plaid. She also wears a skirt despite already wearing pants, and then finishes her outfit with ugly boots. Note none of her clothes match.
Here are some more examples of hipsters:
Notice the glasses again, which contain the classic oversized look. His hair is utterly ridiculous, mustache horrendous, and his sweater is vomit-inducing.
This hipster clearly has no mirror in his house, as his hair is a joke. Hipsters embrace unkept hair, as they see it as another way to do what they think is breaking social barriers.
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