or “How Many Times Can One Make the Same Song?”

Hey everyone. School’s out, so I’ll probably have time to do this more often… Like now. First of all, I changed the way the page looks, because white on black was hurting my eyes… and a lot of the text formatting was difficult to see. I think this works a lot better. Alright, let’s start off with this:

After 4 years since he released his last album, Confessions, Usher has returned to the music biz to make sure we all know he’s still alive and kickin’. Er, rather, standing. In front of cars at some kind of… carnival. Paul Robeson and Martin Luther King Jr. biography references aside, in his new album, Here I Stand, Usher comes back and lays down a handful of tracks that really expose himself as a person with a soul and conscious thought. He provides social commentary, and discusses real life issues that are often sideswiped by popular media. He really put a great amount of effort into this album to make sure that people know that his songs are not just for entertainment, or background music while you are lovin’ up your lady, but rather a medium for philosophical thought and social criticism. He follows in the footsteps of Stevie Wonder and Marvin Gaye.

Or not.

No, he doesn’t do this, sadly, despite having a perfect opportunity for it. Nope, it’s 18 (21 if you pay more on iTunes) more songs about how to love your woman, or not love your woman. Thanks Usher, the music scene hasn’t got a lot of those songs in a while. Is this to say that there shouldn’t be songs that talk about the hardships of love? of loss? or on the contrary: the joy of love? No, I’m not saying that. But 18 on the same album? Ugh. It seems all his songs could be easily mistaken for another, and are just a result of a Teddy Pendergrass themed Madlibs gone wrong; that one day, Usher got drunk and wrote a 10 page long paragraph about how he felt about having sex, and a producer said “I’ll get the scissors and rhyming dictionary.” It wouldn’t be so bad if his love songs were a little in-depth, and provided some sort of specificity, but instead we get songs about how love is like “moving mountains.” I’m sure it took him the whole 4 years to come up with that one.

Okay I’m being harsh. There are 2 songs that are not love songs. Sadly, it is the intro, and an interlude. The intro talks about he walks alone in life (or… at least he walks…) and the interlude is about how he’s going to protect his son. It’s almost as if he tried to have some variety in his songs and some higher-up said “Songs not about having sex? Get the hell out of my studio, this isn’t Motown. Do I look like Barry Gordy?” but still managed to bargain these 2 tracks into the album. Though apparently it wasn’t enough, as the intro doesn’t even have an ending.

Well, we have these songs… What are we gonna do? Are they at least good? No. Plain and simple, no. He jumps on the recent hip hop bandwagon of using techno instruments in their songs, at the cost of any sort of musical foundation. Don’t go into this expecting to hear anything worthy of being called RnB. Instead, you get songs that sound like they were made in some guy’s bedroom using Fruityloops that he downloaded and cracked for free. Some of these songs trick you: they start sounding fantastic, enough to make you think “Okay, I’ll keep listening.” Then the weak handclap snare, techno bass, and synth drop. Along with your bowels. They are more of the same, boring, unoriginal songs that attempt to have some originality by using new sounds. Instead, they sound highly derivative, and the sounds often conflict. Acoustic guitar with techno and hip hop in an RnB song? Someone kill me. And the singing isn’t that great either. Now, I know Usher can sing, I’m sure of this. It’s just that he doesn’t. Instead, he yet again falls in the category of singers that, shockingly enough, don’t sing. The only melodic singing is in the chorus, which are often short 4 word lines repeated at least twice, and the verses are just what I call ‘talking in a high voice’, with the occasional “Ohh!” or “Yeaaah!” If you want to rap, then rap. Don’t disguise your raps as songs. It’s insulting to the industry, and my ear drums.

It’s disappointing to see that a genre rich and diverse as RnB can produce such lackluster performers such as Usher. Even more disappointing when we consider that Usher has more fame and notoriety than a lot of more talented, diverse RnB singers, such as Erykah Badu, or Jill Scott. The album is bland, boring, uninteresting, and more of the same ole’ same ole. But it will make bank, judging from the plays the single, Love in This Club, gets. If you are considering buying this album, I suggest you take an ice pick and shove it into your ear canal, as you don’t deserve the right to hear.

F-

I’ve been wanting to use that line for a while now! Finally I got to. Okay. Oh and why an Usher review? Who knows. He came up… somewhere.

-(CE)Ian